Fishing Blooper Number 1:
I worked for weeks trying to set up a time of bonding atop the waters of Lake Halbrook for my dad, my beau at the time, and me. Bad plan. EPIC FAIL. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Don’t jump to conclusions. First, we didn’t come prepared with fishing license. Second, my beau didn’t know how to drive a standard nor back a truck... obviously not from east Texas… possibly no testosterone. Currently, I hope he is eat up with chiggers. Savvy me took over and backed the trailer so my dad could get the boat in the water. At last, time to wet our lines. I baited my hook, not perfect, but sufficient nonetheless. That’s the extent of my fishing wisdom, I can’t cast worth a flip. My self esteem wasn’t shattered though, because as I looked over and discovered that my beau didn’t even know how to bait a hook. I mean, really. What did he do as a child? I fear dress up and Barbie were a significant part of his growing up. Then my terror began to reign in casting; I caught a tire, a huge blob of moss, the boat, and finally a big catch… my dad. Thanks to me, there are still fishies in the sea.
Fishing Blooper Number 2:
Next, I had a handsome young beau who lived on Eagle Mountain Lake. One of our very first dates was… yes, fishing. I was too proud to tell him of my casting nightmares, but smart enough not to cast my line. Instead, I laid out on the dock and simply dropped my line into the water using my calf to hold the reel. I knew I couldn’t catch a fish this way, but it was better than casting a fish hook into my date’s eye socket. It wasn’t five minutes later, that my rod and reel about fell in the water. I accidentally caught a fish. Excitedly I spun the little twisty thingy and brought my fish safely to the dock. Then something came over me and my heart absolutely broke to see a poor, helpless fish stuck to a hook that I couldn’t detach. I had a panic attack. I screamed and cried as my date came to the rescue and freed Willy, or Nemo, or whatever that little fishie’s name was. Again, thanks to me, there are still fishies in the sea.
Fishing Blooper Number 3:
Just this year, I spent time fishing again on Eagle Mountain Lake (I think). By now, I’m wise enough to swear off any fishing activities that include hooks. I would hate to succumb to fuddy dud and not fish at all, so I learned how to fish with a net for this time. My teacher was excellent and I had the best time catching fish without injuring them… unless dropping it onto the dock by accident hurt it. I caught a whopping 3 fish. They were all HUGE, definitely the largest I’ve ever caught, and they each fit neatly into the palm of my hand. I’m now a professional. Of course, thanks to me, there are still fishies in the sea.
My life is comparable to my fishing. Since I don’t have a hook, all the little fishies end up back in the sea.
Since I can’t keep the stubborn fish out of water, I figured the only way to keep them was to cook them. Mrs. Alice gave me a few pounds of locally caught fish so I used a recipe for “pan seared fish” hoping the meal would be relatively healthy. So much for that, ‘pan seared’ to Better Homes & Gardens really means ‘pan fried.’ I don’t think it hindered the consumers too much as the picture indicates what was left over.
Lesson Learned: If you finally keep a fish out of water, you have to train it, I mean cook it, just right for it to be worth anything.
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